Today was my long teaching day. Lecture (the prof, not me) in the a.m., then 2 hours of discussion sections (mine) in the p.m. Long because there is lots of other business to attend to before, in between and after all of this. Anyway, having spent the day with students, I was given my weekly reminder of just how much I love teaching. I really really do. Maybe it's genetic - my mom's a damn fine teacher. Maybe it's just right. And I love that I love it.
I'm in my seventh (yeah, I said it, seventh) year of graduate school. I've been doing research for that long. And you know what? I'm really not very good at it. Actually, I'm a technical whiz in the lab. I'm really good at all the things a trained monkey could do with practice. But the ideas? The big picture thinking? Yeah, it turns out I pretty much suck at that stuff. The stuff that scientific careers are made of. I say all of this somewhat tongue-in-cheek, because I'm finally really ok with it. But it is true, alas.
The good thing, and point of all of this, is that eventually I will have a Ph.D. And what can one do with a Ph.D. when one is cognisant of the fact that they make a crappy scientist? One can teach! I took this TA position with the hopes of honing my teaching skills, bulking up the ol' C.V. and testing the waters as far as this teaching business goes. And I must say... it's going well. I love meeting with my students. I love hearing their ideas and seeing them discuss and learn from each other. I love getting to know them and being there to answer their questions. I really dig what I do.
It's really cool. After last weekend, I've been so energetic about doing the stuff I love. And loving the stuff I do. So I'm really thrilled with how much I dig this teaching gig. How rad!
If I had started this blog a few years back, one may have been able to chart my progression from diligently spinning my wheels to deep depression with the full realization of my mediocrity to the present. I've gotta say... all that other stuff was pretty crappy. And not that it can't or won't change, but I'm so happy with where I am right now. It gives me hope for the future. That I'll be happy with my career, and will make a difference and mean something to someone.
How awesome.
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